Mommy, They're Here?

Remember this: 'They're here'?
  
That was the 1980s and from those rocking Poltergeist films of course.

But in 2011, a family in Coventry has now told ITN news they're living in a house haunted by a poltergeist, having noticed these eery phenomena happening in it:

• pots moving (yikes!)
• lights turning on and off (crikey!)
• drawers shutting (Mary, mother of God!)
• doors slamming shut (somebody call an exorcist!).

The poltergeist has even been accused of murder. A veterinary postmortem implied the family dog died because it was pushed down the stairs.

A medium has confirmed the presence of the poltergeist, and a priest has advised them not to stay (hey, I bet they never thought of that!). Scared out of their wits, the family have had an exorcist round to drive out the 'geist.

A spokeswoman from Bridge Group Ltd stated that previous tenants in the flat had not reported any similar problems. But let's face it ...If there had been, they were hardly going to tell prospective tenants, were they?

...Oh yeah, by the way, some of your pots might go floating across the room on an evening ...and the odd door might slam from time to time, but really, you're gonna love this place!

Possible?

Well, desperate to prove they're no double-yolkers, the family earnestly recorded a few of these incidents on camera.

Judge for yourself:


Have to admit it seems like something of a wind-up!

Seriously ...The floor is out of shot. It doesn't take a special FX guru to hook up an ultra-fine thread - virtually invisible to the camera - and pull the door open or the chair across the floor (I once had a toy that worked like that!). And wasn't that camera was conveniently placed!

But more generally, do you believe there's actually something out there; that there are forces from a world we can't explain?

Or is it simply because scientists haven't barked up the right tree yet, and that one day they'll discover a new magnetic force, type of electron or something that causes this stuff to happen?

Either way, these things are still gonna freak us out until we find a solid explanation for what's behind it all.

In the meantime, though, it's great 'sleepover party'  material, not to mention good for... Hey, did anybody hear something just then?

Source: http://uk.news.yahoo.com/38/20110329/tod-family-captures-poltergeist-on-film-045b8e8.html

Fashion Industry for Pounding from Rocky and Rambo

So Sly Stallone is bringing out his own line of clothing. Well, it certainly beats bringing out your own clothesline!

Based on good ole Rocky and Rambo, the line will contain 'looks for the rebel and the gentleman', says their designer. Great! People were getting tired of the Officer and a Gentleman one, anyway!

Imagine the fun the advertisers will have coming up with names for the items and the line. Picture all those puns zipping back and forth in brainstorming sessions.

But you know what? Why should I let them have all the fun?

Here are a few suggestions of my own: 

Autumn/winter range:
'Clubber Longjohns' (in Apollo Cream colour)
'G.I.jamas' nightwear (in either First Blood red or Guerrilla Green)
'Balboa' boots
'Underdog' dressing gown (black with a challenger-yellow lining).

Spring/summer range:
'Final Bell' flip-flops
'Right hook' hooded tops
'Eye of the Tiger' T-shirts
'Victory' vests
'Survivor' sunglasses
And last but not least, of course: 'Adrian' ascot ties!

(I admit I had to graft for that last one!)

I'm a bit short on Rambo ones, it's fair to say! Do you have any suggestions you could add to the list?

But no aftershaves, please. We already have plenty of smellies, or rather stinkers, from Beckham, Britney, J-Lo and the likes.

Besides, 'Heavyweight Champ' is far too obvious!

Viva la Originality!

'Don't be a raincloud just because you can't be a star.'

This cheerful little phrase is my mantra. I've no wish to infect others with my own despair!

That inspires me. Now it's your turn. 

Is there some ingot of wisdom in particular, or maybe a story or experience, that makes you tick? Or is there something else that keeps the glint in your eye?

As a blogger and copywriter, I constantly have my eyes peeled (ouch!) for things that will trigger an intriguing blog article or generate a fresh, engaging piece of copy.

Just yesterday I was reading an interview with Will Awdry, the creative director of the London branch of Ogilvy, the advertising agency. Mid-way through the interview, he said the most marvellous thing:

'Originality is never dead.' 

That's a gift of a quote for creative people! I liked it so much that I jotted it down in case it ever comes in handy for a work project.

In fact, a lot of people could apply Awdry's quote to their lives too. For if you've never been able to settle or find what you're looking for in life, the world will always have something new for you to discover.

But fall out of love with the world?

Not on your life! I've got originality to find!

'There's something strange about her...'

It's a bit late for that, Papa Gaga! She'll never be normal... unless you know loads more 24-year-old millionairesses.

Apparently, Lady Gaga's dad wants her to stay 'slightly normal', so she only has her tattoos done on the left-hand side of her body. 

Both useless and amusing, this item from The Sun online got me thinking about quirky behaviour and how we all have traits that bring a smile to others' faces.

What's yours?

I have a friend who only eats skinny chips (that's not a cover for me - I've got the moobs to prove it!). One of the others always drinks his tea with the teaspoon still in the cup.

Mine, you ask? Well, whenever we have a Sunday roast for din-dins, I'll always eat the meat last. If I go shopping, I never buy the front item on the shelf. And I never sleep on my stomach; it makes me hungry.

I know, I know: with these quirky little numbers I'm going down in the Wildman Hall of Fame for sure!

Oh and one last thing... In my cups of tea the milk goes in after the water!

'Tis no quirk though, but the right way to enjoy tea!

Betty

Today I'd like to pay tribute to my late grandmother, Elisabeth Mary 'Betty' Jones, who passed away at 10:00 pm on 7 March 2011. 

They say it's always the little things, and in my grandmother's case it really is true. Kindness came naturally to her. She was unselfish to the end and nothing was ever too much trouble.

Her constant acts of kindness in everyday life towards her family and friends made this adorable and loving woman a truly great person.

So if you're here with me now, Nana, watching over me as I type, let me say a few things:

Thank you for getting up just to see me, for the tea and coffee you made, despite the pain you were in.

Thank you for all the cakes and biscuits you let me sample on Saturdays, even though you'd them made for Sundays and I was jumping the queue!

Thank you for the jumpers you knitted me. I wore the Mr-T one on a school trip away once!

Thank you for your generosity when times were tough.

And thank you for always being there till the very end.

I took your copy of A Town Like Alice. I know how much you loved it, so I've decided to keep it for you.

Maybe one day we'll be able to discuss it.

But may you rest in peace now, dear grandmother. Free of pain. Free in spirit. 

And know that you are loved and missed every single moment of every single day.

Pete the Blade!

Another good evening to you, my cyberspace friends!

We all have something that we'd dearly love to do in life but have never gotten round to. What's yours, and why?

Mine is rollerblading!

For years and years I've wanted to do it. Besides seeking a fun and free way to exercise, I've longed to glide as free as a bird down the streets and feel the wind whistle past my ears.

A few years ago, I did actually start to learn, but, as is always the case, I fell down and never took to the piste... okay, street, again. My trusty blades then stayed in a cupboard somewhere for years, gathering dust.

I've decided that that, however, has all got to change!

This year I plan to put it all behind me and strap those babies back on. I want to be able to whizz around 'Redders', or around wherever love, work or life leads my slightly tubby keyster.

As Irene Cara sang, you can dance right through your life. But when it comes to dancing, though, my coordination takes a taxi home and leaves me in David Brent-crab dance mode! Two left feet, ten left toes and a pair of elephant's heels -- that's me!

So maybe instead I can learn to skate through my life -- of course, that and blog my way through it!

Rekindling my Affection?

A fine afternoon to you, dearest reader!

Thought I'd tell you about my latest love interest.

Her name's Kindle.

Slinky, dark and slender, I can take her anywhere. She's so petite... so elegant... she never looks or feels out of place. As well as all that, she's extremely practical.

The first date cost around 111 to 150 pounds, but since then she's been fairly low maintenance! 

If you've not guessed, the object of my affections is Amazon's e-reader, the Kindle.

I've had one since Christmas now and am over the moon with it.

That's because:

1. it saves loads of bookshelf space;
2. it's small and light, and easy to carry around or store;
3. it has a built-in dictionary;
4. it has a notes and highlighter function for studying;
5. the books are cheaper;
6. you can download the books in seconds;
7. you can get free books for it;
8. I can be a book nerd and still look fly!

Being a proud Kindle owner won't stop me from strutting into Waterstones from time to time, though.

Perusing the shelves and reading blurbs is part of the fun. Finding a novel that's not vampire fiction is also a wholesome challenge.

I'll still frequent charity shops for a bargain book to get cosy with, too. They did get me started on James Ellroy after all!

But the Kindle and I are an item now. That's something the 'Stones' will have to accept, or at least they'll have to work harder for my affection.

We can still be friends, though.

Fancy a Garage Wail?

Hey, what do you think of the Foo Fighters' new campaign? Have you heard about it?

The Foos are planning something that little bit different to promote their new album, Wasting Light. Rather than play at clubs and arenas, they'll be performing at eight different garages from New York through to the grunge capital of Seattle.

The band are running a competition that gives fans the chance to host a Foo Fighters gig in their own garage. There they'll play songs from the new album, which itself was recorded in a garage.

But who would you like to have in yours, and why?

Imagine you were the most unpopular girl or guy in the school - if you're not already! - and that you could bolster your cred by having a supergroup play in your garage. Who would it be?

I'd have Bruce Springsteen or Motley Crue! Brucie because of his showmanship and his skills with the guitar and harmonica; the Crue because, besides rock, you can be sure they'd have some colourful characters with them. 

And who would you not invite?  I'd have to go with teen heart-throb Justin Bieber.

Not just because he's not even old enough to drink. More that my garage door can't keep out all those rampant, lust-filled teeny boppers. Neither can my fence cope with being scaled in the masses.

Naturally, I'm jealous of him, too. He's attracted more girls in five minutes than I have in my whole life! If only I could draw in crowds like that!

But hey, maybe I can do it with this righteous blog of mine instead!

Green-eyed monsters aside, though, I don't have the space for all those dance routines! That's the honest truth!

Oh, and for the record, I'm not the unpopular kid in school, either.

You Snooze, You Lose ...Or Do You?

Good evening, dear reader, wherever you may be!

A nice feelgood article - or maybe feelbad one, depending on how you look at it - in The Sun online today about a guy who scooped 17.8 million after his girlfriend left him for being dull.

The girl herself has been dubbed Britain's unluckiest woman following the ill-timed split. In all fairness, the guy did list sleeping as his hobby, so maybe she had good reason to head for the door.

Fair play to her, though, for not crawling back and sniffing around for a few quid. Congratulations to him as well - with 17.8 million quid in his wallet, I guess he'll somehow find a way to mend his broken heart!

Meanwhile, I'm back on the singles market and fancy-free.

It's not so bad, but to whoever walks into my life next (preferably, brunette!), I hope you'll stand by me even if:

• I'm always leaving coffee cups lying around; 
• I'm trapped in the 1980s;
• I'm always geeking it up on the Net;
• I'm mad for my bed (it's not a hobby, though!).

If you can't, then at least stick around until the numbers have been drawn, babe.

For you never know - my next phone call might be a celebratory one from Argentina, rather than from work to ask if there's anything we need from the supermarket on the way back!

After all, I still have the whales to see!

The End of the World As We Know It, But I Feel Fine

Hello to you, dear Reader!

What better way to start the day than by reading an online article about different ways the world could end! That's how I kicked it off and I'd like to share the findings with you!

No 1: Asteroids
Hurtling straight in at No 1, a change in gravity may see an asteroid collide with Earth as early as 2038. But scientists say they can't predict the effects until 2028 at the earliest. Either way, please do get back to me on that, would you?

So now you can start planning how to tell your dream girl or dream boy how you feel, before an asteroid smashes into you both! Or you can go out and vandalise your neighbour's car, safe in the knowledge you'll escape the claws of Justice, if not those of the Reaper.  

No 2: Solar Storms
Blazing the trail at No 2 are solar storms. The sun's magnetic field goes potty and sends massives geysers (not 'geezers') of hot gas and charged particles from the surface up into space. Solar flares can wipe out 300 transformers in 90 seconds and cut off power for 130 million people.

The Sun is set to reach the peak of its activity cycle in 2013. So if you've got nothing planned, set your watch because you've got this to look forward to now! Nothing like going out in a blaze of glory!

No 3: Pole Shifts
Drifting in at No 3 was a shift in the poles. Now we face the threat of a magnetic field reversal that would cause the Earth's entire mantle to shift, in turn causing the North and South Pole to move and triggering all kinds of cataclysmic events.

But NASA have played it all down. They predict this ain't gonna happen and that such a shift would not see Earth meet its fate. Call me cynical if you like but, with all those shuttles and spaceships right next to them, they're not likely to stick around if they're wrong!

No 4: Supervolcanic Eruptions
Smouldering at No 4, it's supervolcanic eruption. Mount Toba, Sumatra, Indonesia was the last supervolcano to erupt, which it did 75 000 years ago.

Thousands of kilometres of black ash and sulphur were belched into the atmosphere, blocking out the sun and causing global temperatures to fall by 21 degrees C, and gas poisoning produced acid rain. Only a few thousand of the population were said to be left.

International scientists are now saying that the Yellowstone caldera, in Wyoming, is showing signs of activity. This supervolcano is thought to erupt every 600 000 years, but the last eruption was 640 000 years ago, so it should be any moment now. In the meantime you can be digging out last summer's sun block!

No 5: Global Warming
Getting hot under the collar at No 5 is our old favourite: global warming. If the temperature rises by just 6 degrees C, rainforests will be obliterated and heat-related deaths will be more frequent.

Soil will become infertile and air quality will be so poor it would harm, if not possibly destroy, human respiratory systems. Natural disasters will also be more common.

That's in the worst case scenario, though. For all you sun freaks out there, the good news is that London would also be as hot as Cairo!

Okay, I'm messing around, but suppose you were told the world really was gonna end. You had one last day on Earth and were determined to go happy.

What would you do before you went?


Source: Yahoo! News:http://uk.news.yahoo.com/38/20110304/tsc-five-ways-the-world-could-end-98fda55.html

Bad Hair Life?

Last night I had the weirdest dream/ nightmare.

In it, I went to a barber's and the guy cutting my hair disappeared in the middle of the job. Rather than the smooth and sophisticated short and spiky look I wanted, he gave me the flattest, most God-awful comb-over you can imagine.

I had a side parting that started half way down the left hand side of my head. To make matters worse, he'd also dyed my hair without my permission. It was a kind of Zack Morris from Saved By The Bell colour. Yuk!

But help was at hand - or so I thought. The girl who I asked to sort it out merely trimmed the edges. In the end, I kicked up a stink John McEnroe would have been proud of and had it all shaved off.

But what did it all mean?

For a bit of fun, I looked for interpretations on the internet. One plausible interpretation was that having your hair cut badly in a dream suggests feelings of a decreased sense of power. You may have been criticised unfairly and feel off-balance, off-centre or even worthless.

I may have come in for a bit of stick in the past year or so, but Deputy Dawg, where did the rest of it come from!

A funnier interpretation I found - this time of the 'so bad it's good' variety! - was on a forum. According to one internet surfer, if you dream this and are planning to get your hair cut, you should 'just' wait until the correct lunar phase to do it.

Apparently, the full moon phase is the time to look at your achievements so far and keep things on track, to make adjustments and to clear the deadwood (and why not the Jedward with it!) out of your life. If you want your hair to grow back thicker, this is the phase to take the scissors to it in!

Our astronomer friend goes on to say that the full moon to third quarter phase is the time to take stock of your life, study and make plans. Healthwise, it's a good time for depilatory treatment, dying your hair or begining a health and fitness programme. Wanting your hair to grow back quicker? Quit fooling around and get to your hairdresser! 

Conclusion

Study lunar cycles, ladies and gents. Then , as you do, find a gym, hairdresser or beauty parlour open between midnight and 6:00 am, the third quarter hours! I'm sure they'd be overjoyed to go without sleep just so they can wax your hairy back at 3:00 am!

Okay, so I'm just having a bit of fun. But going back to my own dream now - what do you think it meant? I'd love to hear your interpretation. Mentally, I feel pretty tough these days. So reduced power isn't the culprit for my sub-conscious comb-over!

Maybe you'd like to tell me what you dream about? Who knows? We may even share the same ones.